Dillinger's Friend

Date: 28 Mar 2001
 

Thus spake -AD- :

>"Members of the jury, you will note that at no time did my client - OOH! 
>LOOK, A SHINY THING!!! - state that on the night in question he was 
>anywhere in the vicinity of - LOOK!  ANOTHER PRETTY SHINY THING!! - the 
>apartment where the alleged offence took place.."

They say Dillinger escaped that way once. He had a pack rat living with him
in his cell once as he was awaiting trial. Didn't have nothing to do but make
friends with that pack rat. He'd give it little shiny things he cadged from the
deputies. Helped it sort out its treasures. Nursed it when it was sick,
regurgitated
food for it.

Then, when the day came for him to stand trial, he stole that pack rat's 
treasure and took it with him to the courthouse. As the trial progressed, he
began surreptitiously scattering little shiny objects onto the floor. Pretty
soon
the lawyers, judge, bailiffs, and everybody else in the courtroom were all
crawling on the floor with blank stares admiring all the pretties. Dillinger
was able to just walk right out of there. They say that somewhere, nobody
knows where, there's an abandoned courtroom where those people are still
there, emaciated, crawling around and looking at the shinies. And nearby
is an old jailhouse, the lair of an old, betrayed, embittered pack rat, who can
no longer trust anybody in the world, and now breathes fire on anybody who
dares to approach its treasure.

Joel T.